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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/22531855">if there’s no sign of the morrow our souls remain clean</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/silversilky/pseuds/silversilky'>silversilky</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>BandoRevue AU [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>BanG Dream! (Anime), BanG Dream! Girl's Band Party! (Video Game), 少女☆歌劇 レヴュー・スタァライト | Shoujo Kageki Revue Starlight (Anime)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Action &amp; Romance, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Unrequited Love, froot loops - Freeform</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-02-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-02-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-04-28 12:35:15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>8,000</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/22531855</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/silversilky/pseuds/silversilky</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A spotlight catches her, and another one, brighter, follows Flora and Claire--Ran and Yukina--as they ascend far out of reach. To someplace she can't follow. Lisa reaches out her hands despairingly, allowing grief to take her voice and twist it. "Oh, and so it repeats... The cycle of despair, beneath the light of the stars..."</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hikawa Hina &amp; Imai Lisa, Imai Lisa &amp; Minato Yukina, Minor or Background Relationship(s), sayotsugu cameo</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>BandoRevue AU [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1620568</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>44</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>if there’s no sign of the morrow our souls remain clean</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>includes potential spoilers for the revstar anime past episode 7!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>There is a goddess on the stage tonight, and her name is Yukina. When she moves, her simple gown flows like water with her, and it makes her feel ethereal. Otherworldly. When she meets Lisa's eyes from inside the cage, Lisa can feel her breath catch. She's the most beautiful girl Lisa has ever seen... and it's almost enough to make her forget her line.</p><p> </p><p>Almost, but not quite. She's training to become a stage girl too, after all.</p><p> </p><p>"Why were we imprisoned here?" she asks the audience, perhaps a bit too quickly to catch up. The others surround her, eyes cast down to the floor as Ran and Yukina--Flora and Claire--both turn their gaze upward. "What sins did we commit? Amidst the flow of time, we goddesses have forgotten even that."</p><p> </p><p>A spotlight catches her, and another one, brighter, follows Flora and Claire as they ascend far out of reach. To someplace she can't follow. Lisa reaches out her hands despairingly, allowing grief to take her voice and twist it.</p><p> </p><p>"Oh, and so it repeats... The cycle of despair, beneath the light of the stars..."</p><p> </p><p>The two continue to rise, even as the fallen goddesses call out and fight to stop them. Eventually they reach the tower's peak, and as they exit the cage and stare to the star in wonder, they reach out together to pluck it from the heavens. "Claire's star, it's here right before us..."</p><p> </p><p>The fallen goddesses cry out in unison, Lisa's voice among them. "And it shall be bestowed upon you, the star which you have longed for!"</p><p> </p><p>A flash of red! Scarlet rays tear a tattered hole in the world, and Flora screams, tumbling away and desperately clutching her eyes. "My eyes! The light--it blinds me!" She stumbles back further, out of Claire's reach. "Claire! Where are you, Claire!?"</p><p> </p><p>The light surrounding her flickers out as she reaches the edge of the tower, and Claire falls to her knees. "I remember now..." she says with wonder and horror, "your name is..." Tears fall, and Lisa remembers the long hours Yukina spent practicing performing sorrow on command. Nothing less than the real thing for her. "Forgive me, Flora. Our dream was not meant to be..."</p><p> </p><p>"Her eyes burned by the light of the stars, Flora fell from the tower, forever parting with Claire." Lisa gestures upward, and the lights follow her movement to alight on the stars that hang over the tower.</p><p> </p><p>"And high above, the stars continued to shine for eternity."</p><p> </p><p>The curtains draw in and right on cue the audience bursts into applause. Everything is exactly as planned, the story plays out exactly according to schedule. It may be their first performance, but after so much practice their class has become a fine-tuned tragedy machine.</p><p> </p><p>Lisa's gaze darts around, searching for her best friend. She takes off her headdress and lays down her styrofoam replica swords, and as she does so she notices the way her hands are shaking. It's tempting to blame it on adrenaline, but Lisa knows that's not entirely it.</p><p> </p><p>She's made herself a promise. After the performance... she's going to tell Yukina how she feels. How she's always felt.</p><p> </p><p>Ah, and there she is now, to send a new bolt of anxiety down Lisa's spine. She's across the stage, still wearing the goddess gown. Her hair has been pulled up into a messy ponytail, and she wipes the sweat from her brow. It's the most gorgeous thing Lisa has ever seen.</p><p> </p><p>She takes one step forward, and stops. Yukina isn't alone.</p><p> </p><p>She's with Ran and Sayo now, and the three of them seem deep into a conversation-- likely something that'd go over Lisa's head. She's a stage girl, of course, and she's dedicated just like they are. But there's simply no denying that compared to the others, she's not at the same level. And she can't exactly just go up and pull Yukina out of the group...</p><p> </p><p>Maybe... maybe that conversation can wait. For a bit, at least. A bittersweet smile twitches its way onto her face, and then she turns to go.</p><p> </p><p>Exit stage left: Lisa Imai, Coward Supreme.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>"Uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." A weighty thud as Lisa's head hits the table, and she regrets it immediately as a dull bolt of pain shoots through her poor skull. She reaches up to gingerly rub the impact zone, and pouts to her companions. "Seriously, how'd you two do it?"</p><p> </p><p>"Do what, Imai-san?" Sayo looks concerned, but also confused by her outburst. Tsugumi reaches over and pats her arm-- so easily! So casually! They've only been dating for a few weeks. God, Lisa's so jealous.</p><p> </p><p>"Sayo-san, I think she's talking about us deciding to be... um, us, I suppose..."</p><p> </p><p>Sayo coughs abruptly and looks away. "Ah. So it was that."</p><p> </p><p>"Really, though! I didn't think you two knew each other at all, and now look at you!" Lisa points to Sayo's arm, which Tsugumi is now casually wrapped around. The two others stare at their entaglement as well, expressions clearly showing that they didn't even realize it had happened. Tsugumi turns bright pink. Sayo sits up ramrod straight. And neither of them move from their position an inch.</p><p> </p><p>Lisa leans back into her chair, a smile growing despite the prickling jealousy in her heart. "Wait, Sayo, Moca did tell me something. She said Tsugumi beat you up?"</p><p> </p><p>"No, that's not what happened!" Tsugumi cries out, mortified, as Sayo responds with a nod and a proud and confident "Yes, that's true."</p><p> </p><p>The two gape at each other, and Lisa can't help but start giggling. "Oh my gosh, you two, you're adorable!"</p><p> </p><p>"Yes, Hazawa-san is. But getting back to the matter at hand," Sayo says as she turns her sharp gaze back to Lisa, "can I assume the cause of these outbursts is something related to Minato-san?" From the widening of Lisa's eyes and the intake of breath, Sayo can probably tell she's right on the mark. But how'd she know...?</p><p> </p><p>"We kinda... talked about it the other day." Tsugu looks sheepish as she confesses it. "The way your mood has been flip-flopping so much, and the way your voice changes when you talk about her... and, er, how MUCH you talk about her..."</p><p> </p><p>"Ahh, haha... I'm that obvious, huh?"</p><p> </p><p>Sayo is quick to shut her down before anxiety can seep its way into her mind. "I do not believe Minato-san has guessed at your true feelings, Imai-san, because I do not believe Minato-san could guess the feelings of a dog begging at her feet as she opens a bag of treats."</p><p> </p><p>Lisa snorts. It's true, and that puts her somewhat at ease. "Sayo, I just... I don't want her to know, but at the same time, I do... I'm supposed to be the one everybody goes to for advice on things like this, but I can't even help myself."</p><p> </p><p>Something turns around in her gut as her mind goes to another possibility. "I don't even know if she likes girls, or if... or how she'd react if she knew I... did..."</p><p> </p><p>"Well, she already knows very well that I'm gay," Sayo says matter-of-factly, "and she hasn't shown any issues with my relationship with Hazawa-san. Quite the opposite, the other day she took me aside and told me she's gladdened by how I seem calmer and happier these days as a result of it."</p><p> </p><p>Tsugumi reaches over the table and takes her hand firmly. "I believe in you, Lisa-san! It's scary, trust me, I know, but either way I'm sure you won't regret putting your feelings out there."</p><p> </p><p>Sayo nods to confirm her agreement. At the sight of their faces side by side, filled with confidence in her, Lisa feels her heart swell up with gratefulness that she's able to have friends like them. She takes Sayo's hand as well and squeezes both hands firmly. "You two... thank you, seriously. I'm gonna tell her soon."</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>The definition of the word "soon" is pretty vague, so it's fine that Lisa is still putting it off after three weeks, right?</p><p> </p><p>She waits until she's finished applying her eyeliner to sigh. No, it's really not. And it's starting to affect her performance in class as well... Thinking back to some of the more intimate stretches she'd done with Yukina earlier that day, Lisa's head begins to swim, and she furiously dabs blush on her cheeks. Not that they need any more at this point.</p><p> </p><p>She looks in the mirror at the stylish beauty (gay trainwreck) before her, and growls. She's not letting anything get in her way anymore! Yukina better watch out, because Lisa is coming to get her girl!</p><p> </p><p>Packing up her various bottles and brushes into a small red bag, Lisa leaves the restroom with a manufactured spring in her step, and narrowly avoids the girl outside. "Ah!"</p><p> </p><p>"... Lisa-san." Ran moves back and nods. "Hey."</p><p> </p><p>Lisa's expression turns to a carefree smile a moment later than she'd like it to. "Hey, Ran! How are you doing?"</p><p> </p><p>"Not bad. Just working on some fundamentals with somebody." Her voice is short and clipped, but Lisa knows she's always like that. A grin sneaks up as she sees a weak point in the girl's armor.</p><p> </p><p>"Somebody~? That's a bit of a rude way to refer to Moca, you know."</p><p> </p><p>Right on cue, Ran flushes as red as the streak in her hair. Haha! Some of the girls here are seriously so fun to tease, oh my gosh. "I didn't say it was--okay, yeah, it was Moca. What about it?"</p><p> </p><p>"Nothing, nothing." Lisa puts her hands together, stifling the urge to giggle that had built up. She taps her fingertips together as she processes the rest of Ran's words. "But... fundamentals? You were brilliant as Flora last month, I didn't see any signs of a lack of progress there!"</p><p> </p><p>"Ah... thanks. But, that was last month, you know?" There's a spark dancing around in Ran's eyes. "Stage girls have an obligation to keep charging forward regardless of anything. That's how I see it, at least, and I know Sayo-san and Minato-san agree."</p><p> </p><p>Lisa feels something in her chest shrink. "Eheh... that's how Yukina sees it, hmm? Good to know."</p><p> </p><p>Ran blinks. "She hasn't said that to you? You two are closer than anybody here."</p><p> </p><p>Before Lisa can reply, the two are interrupted by a familiar, lazy drawl. "Heyyyyyyo." Arms come from behind Ran to flop around her, and a chin is rested on her shoulder. Moca looks like she's having the time of her life. "Lisa-san! Comrade!"</p><p> </p><p>She lets out a giggle. No need to hold it in with Moca around. "Comrade? Not, like, friend? Classmate?"</p><p> </p><p>"Ohoho, absolutely not! For Moca-chan knows you're a true blue comrade in the most important thing to any stage girl." The grin on Moca's face is alarming, but not as much as what comes next. "Pining after moody actresses!"</p><p> </p><p>"What!?" Ran cuts in, annoyed, as Lisa replies as well with a "...What?"</p><p> </p><p>"Our resident baby Tsugu let it slip after a patented Moca-chan interrogation." Moca points dramatically, as if she had caught Lisa in some sort of elaborate lie. "You're in love with Minato-san~!"</p><p> </p><p>"Moca, we already went through this, the Geneva Conventions specifically disallow Moca-chan interrogations," Ran begins, but Lisa isn't listening.</p><p> </p><p>"Tsugumi..." she mutters worriedly, "oh, Tsugu, why'd you spill your beans!?"</p><p> </p><p>Ran finishes scolding Moca, who doesn't look even the slightest bit remorseful, and hesitantly puts her hand on Lisa's shoulder. "Hey... I'm, uh, sorry about her. She's an idiot. But, um..."</p><p> </p><p>"What Ran is trying to say is that she wants to help~."</p><p> </p><p>The red noodle shifts as Ran turns away, clearly embarrassed. "Yeah... I, er. I've got some training in flower arrangement. From my dad. And if you want... I can help you put something together for her. Assuming you want to tell her how you feel."</p><p> </p><p>Lisa all but leaps forward to catch Ran in a hug, and the other girl freezes up before slowly, robotically returning the gesture. "Ahh, Ran... thank you so much, I really appreciate it!"</p><p> </p><p>"Of course," Ran mumbles, her face burning up. "Anything for a... classmate."</p><p> </p><p>"Comrade~!"</p><p> </p><p>"Moca, shut the fuck up."</p><p> </p><p>"Understood!"</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>The bouquet is in Lisa's hands, and she doesn't feel its small weight as she paces back and forth and back and forth like a woman possessed. She did it, she really did it, she left that little note in Yukina's desk asking her to meet in the garden at 7:00--she checks her watch, and it reads 6:53. She breathes heavily and wipes sweat off her palms.</p><p> </p><p>She shouldn't be this nervous, doesn't need to be, right? Yukina's been her best friend practically since birth. They're so close, what's the big deal if they get a little... closer?</p><p> </p><p>And there are so many people backing her up. Sayo, Tsugumi, Ran, even Moca in her way, and others, too... girls in class who heard the rumors, and did their best to encourage Lisa in subtle ways. It's not just Lisa putting herself out here alone. She believes that.</p><p> </p><p>It's fate, isn't it?</p><p> </p><p>It's okay for her to love Yukina with all she has, because Yukina will love her back.</p><p> </p><p>6:55.</p><p> </p><p>She has to carefully control her grip, or she'll crush the bouquet in her hands. Can't have that. Only the best for Yukina, in all things. Including love. Is she the best choice for Yukina?</p><p> </p><p>6:57.</p><p> </p><p>She has to believe she is, or she'll start running and never stop.</p><p> </p><p>6:59.</p><p> </p><p>Footsteps echo on the pavement, it's the sound of Yukina's small, practical shoes. Lisa knows it well. Too well. She helped Yukina pick out those shoes. They're white and a bit wider than the rest they were looking at. Yukina said she didn't mind the sound, it would help her tell the number of steps she was taking on stage. Lisa heard that and was so shocked--she'd never thought of bothering to count her own. The dedication to her craft that Yukina has, it's just one reason why Lisa fell in love with her over and over and over again.</p><p> </p><p>Lisa turns, holding the bouquet tight, a wavering smile on her lips. She sees the expression on Yukina's face, and</p><p> </p><p>her heart</p><p> </p><p>falls</p><p> </p><p>right out of her chest.</p><p> </p><p>7:01.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>The stage looks so different at night. She guesses she should have expected something different, given that she more or less forced her way in here. There's no audition going on right now. Only a desperate plan taking form.</p><p> </p><p>"You said if we win the revues, you'll give us any stage we want to perform on. Right?"</p><p> </p><p>The bear stares at her with huge, unblinking black eyes, and claps its pink paws together at her question. It replies, so frustratingly slowly, "That's correct! The Top Star will have any stage she grizzly well desires!"</p><p> </p><p>"Then," Lisa croaks out, hating herself more with each word, "can I... can I go back to that stage? The first performance of Starlight? Before I..."</p><p> </p><p>A nod. With the size of its head, it's almost funny.</p><p> </p><p>Back when she could stand in Yukina's light and admire her from afar, without causing her pain... She doesn't need to be at Yukina's side. Watching her rise from below is enough. It's enough. If she tells herself that enough, it will be true.</p><p> </p><p>Lisa sees the way forward.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>"Imai-san, stop this!"</p><p> </p><p>A crash of metal echoes across the stage, then another, and another still, coming faster as Lisa swings her swords in a whirlwind of violence directed forward. Sayo can barely hold her own, she's far less effective at close range like this. All according to Lisa's strategy. She couldn't put this up to chance.</p><p> </p><p>"This is not you, Imai-san! Snap out of it!" Sayo barks, unnerved by Lisa's silence and the cold efficiency of her blows. Maybe she expects Lisa to be weaker than this. Not this time.</p><p> </p><p>Lisa can't see the expression on Sayo's face, doesn't bother looking at it. The only thing that concerns her is the thin rope holding Sayo's cape on. The only thing she sees is the way forward.</p><p> </p><p>"I'm sorry," she whispers, and she makes the cut. "Position Zero."</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>"Oh, and so it repeats... The cycle of despair, beneath the light of the stars..."</p><p> </p><p>The words taste metallic on her tongue, a familiar flavor. But that doesn't matter. Neither does the means by which this happened, only that it did. The world turned back. Lisa got her second chance...</p><p> </p><p>Ah, and there she goes now. Yukina's even more beautiful than she was the first time around, and Lisa, despite herself, loves her even more than before. Her light. How blinding it is, as she rises to the heavens with Flora. It doesn't matter that the two are heading to a tragic end. Nothing matters except this moment.</p><p> </p><p>She's so beautiful in her cage.</p><p> </p><p>A flash of red! Lisa never said her line, but it's all right, even if Ran is looking at her funny. Flora is falling from the tower, same as before. Claire is despondent, and Yukina pulls off her grief just as well as she did before. The audience is clapping, the curtains are drawn.</p><p> </p><p>The play is done, and now what?</p><p> </p><p>Lisa doesn't have an answer the next morning, or the next after that.</p><p> </p><p>Each new day feels like a dream--can they count as new when she's been through them already, beat for beat? Tsugumi is about to say hi, and she lifts her hand up to wave the same way she did last time. Unending deja vu. A life that's been lived before.</p><p> </p><p>"Lisa, are you all right?" The voice forces her to focus back on Yukina, who sits across from her with a questioning gaze. "You seem distant."</p><p> </p><p>"Yeah!" she says, and inside her stomach something churns. She forces out a bit of peppy conversation. "Hey, Yukina, how'd you do in jumping practice? I couldn't ever get my legs to cooperate, hehe!" She looks up, and freezes as she makes eye contact with... her friend.</p><p> </p><p>Yukina blinks, caught off guard. "It was fine. Are you certain there's nothing bothering you?" She reaches out a small, slender hand and places it on Lisa's forehead, and Lisa feels her entire body tense up. "You feel warm... would you like me to walk you to the nurse? I won't let you suffer in silence."</p><p> </p><p>The words force their way out of her throat, a low mumble that won't be stopped. "Yukina, I love you so much..."</p><p> </p><p>"...What...?"</p><p> </p><p>Lisa stands up, knocking her chair over, and bolts from the room before she can see the look on Yukina's face. No! No no no no no no, you idiot! You fucked it up! This was the second chance and you--</p><p> </p><p>She half-opens, half-slams the door to her room open and locks it behind her before slowly slumping down onto the floor. She puts her face in her hands and moans. "Ohhh... oh, why'd you have to do that?"</p><p> </p><p>If only she could take it back...</p><p> </p><p>Oh.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>"And so it repeats... The cycle of despair, beneath the light of the stars..."</p><p> </p><p>"Yukina, I love you..."</p><p> </p><p>"Oh, and so it repeats... The cycle of despair, beneath the light of the stars..."</p><p> </p><p>"I really, I've always--"</p><p> </p><p>"Oh, and so it repeats... The cycle of despair, beneath the light of the stars..."</p><p> </p><p>"I need to tell you something."</p><p> </p><p>"Oh, and so it repeats..."</p><p> </p><p>"Please, please love me Yukina--"</p><p> </p><p>"The cycle of despair,"</p><p> </p><p>"Yukina, I just--"</p><p> </p><p>"Beneath the light of the stars."</p><p> </p><p>"Yukina!"</p><p> </p><p>Round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round she goes where she'll stop nobody knows round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and--</p><p> </p><p>A dagger plunges into the heart of Position Zero.</p><p> </p><p>Lisa blinks heavily. She squints into the bright light before her, and sees something new for the first time in lifetimes. "Sayo...?"</p><p> </p><p>"Nah, but close!" the vision says, and yanks the dagger back into her palm by its chain. Her short, braided hair wavers in the faint breeze. Lisa doesn't even know where they are. She can't see anything but the other girl's eyes.</p><p> </p><p>She's never seen eyes like this before, so carefree yet filled with fire.</p><p> </p><p>"Who are you...?"</p><p> </p><p>"Big sis never talked about me? Aww." She absentmindedly twirls the dagger, coming dangerously close to nicking herself with its edge. "Hina Hikawa, at your service!" The handle of the blade flies back into her hand, and the girl gives her a blinding grin. "I'll be taking that brilliance of yours!"</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Lisa wakes to the steady chirp of her alarm and sits up as if struck by lightning, breathing heavily. What was that? Was that real...? She exhales and rubs her head, before swinging her legs off the bed and moving to the closet to throw on her uniform and wash her face, not bothering with anything more than the most basic makeup today.</p><p> </p><p>No use worrying about it. She's got to get to class. She slips her shoes on and does a few simple stretches in the extra minutes, then heads out, her head still swirling.</p><p> </p><p>In the hallway, she spots a familiar little head of brown hair bobbing up and down rapidly as the girl skirts around students, leaving apologies in her wake. Tsugumi, scurrying around as usual with a stack of books. They look heavy...</p><p> </p><p>"Hey, Tsugumi! Lemme take some of that." Lisa flashes her best 'big sister friend' smile before reaching over to grab the top half of the stack, holding back a grunt as she realizes how heavy they really are. She leans back to balance herself before walking.</p><p> </p><p>Tsugumi looks apologetic. "Ah, Lisa-san! I can't ask you to--"</p><p> </p><p>"I already did." Lisa giggles and bumps against Tsugumi's side. "Don't worry about it."</p><p> </p><p>"...Thank you." An embarrassed smile. How cute!</p><p> </p><p>The two trudge forward in silence for a few moments, before Lisa realizes that this is a good opportunity. She takes a moment to put her thoughts together. "Hey, Tsugumi...?" The other girl picks up on her tone, and stops so she can pay full attention. Aw, Tsugumi, always so sweet. "Does Sayo have a sister?"</p><p> </p><p>Tsugumi's books fall from her hands and onto the floor with a loud crash. One hits the toe of Lisa's shoe, and she has to try so, so valiantly to just squeeze her eyes shut and not drop her own stack.</p><p> </p><p>"Ah, fuck! Wait! No, Ran said I can't say that word! Ahh, I'm sorry, Lisa-san!" Tsugumi waves her arms frantically, before crouching down to start getting her things back in order. "I just, ahh..." She sighs.</p><p> </p><p>"Is it... a touchy subject?" Lisa asks faintly.</p><p> </p><p>"...Yeah. You could say that... I wouldn't bring it up around her. At least not yet..." Tsugumi stands back up, teetering slightly, and bites her lip. "She's told me a lot about Hina, but I can tell it takes a lot out of her."</p><p> </p><p>Hina.</p><p> </p><p>Hina Hikawa, the girl in her vision.</p><p> </p><p>"Thanks, Tsugumi," she hears herself say faintly, then her footsteps speed up into a half-jog. Tsugumi makes a noise in reply, but she isn't in a state to process that right now. She pushes her way into the classroom and puts the books down on Tsugumi's desk, barely conscious of the action.</p><p> </p><p>She sits in her own chair and stares at her desk, stares through it. Hina Hikawa. Where was she right now? Lisa feels her hand twitch, searching for a sword's familiar grip. Was she a threat?</p><p> </p><p>At some point, the rest of the class must have filed in and gotten settled down, because their teacher clapped twice to get their collective attention. "Everyone! I've got something important to tell you all. We've got a new transfer student arriving today, and she's coming in from a prestigious foreign academy. Make sure you all give her a warm welcome."</p><p> </p><p>This doesn't happen, Lisa realizes with a shot of ice through her veins as she begins to shake, THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN. This is not the next line. Improvisation has no place on her stage.</p><p> </p><p>The door flies open, and a cheery girl jogs in excitedly, her teal braids flying back as she twirls to face the class. She flashes two V signs and a cheerful grin. "Hey, all! Hina Hikawa here! I think we're gonna have a real boppin' time together!"</p><p> </p><p>A loud scraping sound as a chair is roughly shoved back, and a heavy thump-thump-thump as someone moves quickly past Lisa's place. She catches a brief glimpse of Sayo as she stalks out of the classroom, but can't see her face.</p><p> </p><p>"Hikawa-san? Hikawa-san, where are you going?" the teacher calls out indignantly.</p><p> </p><p>Tsugumi quickly follows her girlfriend, bowing apologetically before she leaves. "So sorry, I'm gonna--I'm gonna go get her, I apologize if we don't come back before the end of class...!" and then she's gone too.</p><p> </p><p>The teacher sighs deeply, rubbing her eyes before turning to Hina. "You may pick whatever seat you like. I hope the rest of the class takes your arrival more in stride."</p><p> </p><p>"It's all right! Big sis is always like that," Hina says cheerily, setting off a wave of whispers and mutters through the class at the confirmation that the two are related. As if their names, hair color, and faces weren't evidence enough.</p><p> </p><p>Lisa's hand shoots up, still shaking slightly, and she hears herself speak. "You can sit over here, Hina-san!" Keep your enemies close, right? She doesn't know what else to do right now.</p><p> </p><p>Hina's eyes sparkle, and she skips her way down the aisle to flop into the seat next to Lisa. "Hey, hey! What's your name?" She's practically wiggling in place with anticipation, and Lisa chokes through the lump in her throat to respond.</p><p> </p><p>"Lisa Imai. Most people just call me Lisa, though." She forces a welcoming smile, but knows it doesn't quite reach her eyes. "Good to meet you!"</p><p> </p><p>"Lisa..." Hina parrots thoughtfully as she leans dangerously far back in her chair, as if tasting how the name feels on her tongue, and despite herself, Lisa feels her cheeks heat up at the lack of any honorific. Her chair drops back down onto all fours with a loud click, and the teacher looks at her annoyedly. Hina doesn't notice, she's too busy clapping her hands together as if she's just realized something important. "Ah!"</p><p> </p><p>She pulls out her phone under the desk, and her fingers fly over the screen. Luckily, the teacher has turned away by now, so she doesn't get another scathing glare over this new flagrant lack of respect for the rules. Hina taps a key with some finality, and shoves the phone back into her pocket.</p><p> </p><p>Lisa feels her own phone buzz in her pocket, and despite herself, she surreptitiously slips it out and opens it, to see...</p><p> </p><p>An airdropped photo of a box of Froot Loops.</p><p> </p><p>"That weirdo bear told me everything," Hina whispers so low Lisa can barely hear, "and I think you're super duper interesting, Lisachi." She makes eye contact and gives Lisa a smile, a genuine one, with a spark dancing in her eyes. "Fighting you should be really boppin'!"</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Her footsteps echo so far here across the empty stage as she stomps towards her target. That goddamn bear. The lights are dim right now, but she can see it fine. It's hard to miss.</p><p> </p><p>"What did you do?"</p><p> </p><p>It turns, slowly enough to stoke Lisa's anger even more. "Hmmm? What's the matter?"</p><p> </p><p>"That girl! Hina! She's not part of this, so how'd she get in?" Lisa yells, balling up her fists at her sides. "You did this. Brought her in from outside somehow..."</p><p> </p><p>Absolute silence takes hold after the echoes die out, and Lisa stands waiting for an answer, her heart thumping heavily from the adrenaline she feels all through her body. Her fingers clutch at the end of her shirt.</p><p> </p><p>"Repeat bearformances..." it starts, staring with dead eyes and not moving an inch, "are so beary boring after a while. Understand?"</p><p> </p><p>Lisa takes a step towards it, her vision growing red, and--</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>--and then she's not there anymore. She's... in class? What class? She looks up from her seat and scans the room, doing her best to not make it obvious that she wasn't all there until right this moment. Her hands are still balled up painfully tight, and when she realizes it she forces them back to a normal position. There's probably going to be some marks where her nails dug into her palms.</p><p> </p><p>All right, Lisa realizes with some relief that she recognizes the teacher. This class was sort of a weird one. They had each been tasked with making several outfits over the course of the month, with the justification that 'a stage girl should know in full detail the limits of her costume!'</p><p> </p><p>To that end, there are several long tables set up, with reams of fabric leaning against them. Ran is carefully tabbing through them, wrinkling her nose at a particularly bold flower print, as Moca lazily drags a muted gray over to her side.</p><p> </p><p>And Yukina--she's looking right at her! "Lisa, what do you think of this? I'm not... particularly good at fashion."</p><p> </p><p>That's an understatement. Lisa has to push some choice comments under the rug as she takes in the fabric Yukina's chosen, a gaudy purple covered in haphazard... cats? Oh, god, are those meant to be cats? Where did the school have this, and why did it not come with a BIOHAZARD warning? "It's... uh, aha, individualistic! You know?"</p><p> </p><p>"I understand," Yukina says, her face clearly showing she does not understand. "Do you have the needles and thread?"</p><p> </p><p>Lisa looks down to her side of the table and sees that she does. "Yeah! Gimme a sec." She reaches to pick them up, and as she does, she hears Hina's loud, overjoyed voice right behind her and freezes in place.</p><p> </p><p>"Hahaha! Tsugu-chan, you're so funny!"</p><p> </p><p>Ah! A sharp pain in her finger. Lisa lets a small noise of alarm escape her and drops the needles, realizing what happened when a bead of red shows up on her fingertip. A light curse dies on her tongue as she realizes she's already drawn unwanted attention to herself.</p><p> </p><p>"Lisa, are you okay?" Yukina says, putting the fabric aside with a worried expression. "Did you get hurt?"</p><p> </p><p>She shakes her head reflexively. "Not at all," she lies so easily, effortlessly. "I just almost slipped on some fabric scraps, is all. Ahh, haha, Yukina, you're such a worrier!" She reaches out with her unhurt hand and ruffles the other girl's hair.</p><p> </p><p>Yukina's face clears up even as her cheeks turn pink from embarrassment, and she nods. "I see."</p><p> </p><p>Lisa feels a small rustling around her pocket, and by the time she looks down the culprit is gone. All they've left is a scrap of blue fabric, hanging out from where it was shoved inside. She takes it out, putting her wounded finger in her mouth to sooth it, and reads the rough writing that's been scrawled on it with a marker.</p><p> </p><p>REVUE TIME TONITE !!! BE READY LISACHI &gt;:)</p><p> </p><p>Then a little drawing of... what is that, caricatures of the two of them fighting? What's Hina holding, a yo-yo? A moment later, she realizes it's meant to be her dagger, hanging on its chain from her hand.</p><p> </p><p>Lisa stuffs the scrap back in her pocket with far more force than necessary.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>The sensation of falling stopped being novel around twenty or thirty loops ago, and it's almost relaxing now. Familiarity is a salve after the twists this latest life has thrown at her, and she lets gravity take her away as the wind whirls and whips at her body.</p><p> </p><p>As always, her thoughts are of Yukina.</p><p> </p><p>I'm doing this for you, she thinks, remembering the shadow that falls over her face each and every time she learns of Lisa's feelings. So one of these days I can keep my mouth shut, and then... then, maybe I can finally just be your best friend again. Properly this time. I'll keep my heart under control, one of these lives.</p><p> </p><p>She makes impact on the barrier, and slips through it into the pure red.</p><p> </p><p>There's an engine rumbling under her, many many machines buzzing and humming and chugging away. Lisa's old friends. She feels her heart synchronize with their rhythm, and the red begins to boil, growing hotter and hotter until--</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>she is reborn.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>Lisa touches down onto the stage, a red cape draped over her shoulder and twin swords already ready at her sides. Her fingers clutch the handles tight as she looks over her surroundings, and... what the hell?</p><p> </p><p>What kind of stage is this?</p><p> </p><p>She feels like she's been tossed headlong into a child's toy box. It's absolute chaos, everywhere she looks. Giant complex mechanisms made from blocks and plastic parts, posters from bands she halfway knows, immense screens with video games set up, playing themselves. All sorts of books, encyclopedias, newspapers, journals in towering stacks. And, strewn about wildly, an abundance of... pictures of Sayo?</p><p> </p><p>At least it wasn't difficult to tell who she'd be facing, even before the girl cries out an introduction. "Lisachi! Heyyy, over here! Welcome to my stage!"</p><p> </p><p>Hina's exactly as Lisa saw her in her vision. Clad in a dark, vaguely masculine fighting ensemble, with a blue cape thrown over her shoulder, she tosses her dagger in the air casually and catches it. Its long, thin chain rattles. "What do you think?"</p><p> </p><p>Lisa doesn't reply, only tightens her jaw and moves to a fighting stance.</p><p> </p><p>"Aww, no comment at all?" Hina says, visibly disappointed. The dagger's handle drops back into her hands, and she spins it around. "Guess I don't mind if you wanna get right to it, though!"</p><p> </p><p>On cue, the music begins, a familiar melody overtaken by deep, booming drums. It sounds like a heartbeat growing faster and stronger by the moment.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>- REVUE OF BONDS -</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>Without warning, Hina's chain snakes across the floor quickly from a flick of her wrist. Lisa leaps back to avoid being tripped, and bumps against a pile of books. In the second it takes her to refocus, Hina zips across the stage into slashing range.</p><p> </p><p>She swings her dagger, and Lisa barely deflects it with a heavy motion from her larger blade. Clang! Another swing, and Lisa spins to the side. The dagger pierces a thick volume, and Hina cries out, "Hey, that one's a classic!"</p><p> </p><p>Lisa readies her swords with a smile, knowing it'll take a moment for Hina to free her weapon--but the expression flickers and turns to shock as she realizes that while she was watching the dagger, Hina's other hand was sending the chain around her leg. She yanks it with all her might, and Lisa is sent flying.</p><p> </p><p>A mighty clash of cymbals echoes through the stage as she collides into a huge screen, and it cracks loudly around her as the impact knocks the wind out of her lungs. She hears a faint "Aw, Red... I'm startin' to lose you." from the game being played, before the screen loses power and flickers off.</p><p> </p><p>Lisa forces herself to her feet as the drums quicken their tempo, gasping for air. Hina is already on the move again, swinging her dagger like a lasso, ready to strike at her at any moment. Lisa waits for the small, telltale flick of her wrist--there it is!</p><p> </p><p>She times her swing perfectly, knocking the dagger to the side and forcing the chain to wrap around her remaining sword. Yanking it with all she has, Hina is pulled towards her, and Lisa gives her a heavy kick to the stomach. "Whoof!" Hina lets out as she stumbles backward. Lisa takes a step forward, and... what? She slips on something, realizing it's a page from one of the countless dictionaries and journals they've knocked over in their frenzy.</p><p> </p><p>Her fumble gives Hina time to recover, and now Lisa's mad. "What's with all this stuff!?"</p><p> </p><p>Hina grins widely, and spreads her arms as if she wants to give the whole stage a hug. Strings overtake the drums, and the music swells up emotionally. "It's all the things I love, Lisachi! Anything I think is neat!"</p><p> </p><p>"Why are you okay with us destroying it all, then?" Lisa replies with more force than she intended to give it. "If it's so precious to you, take better care of it!"</p><p> </p><p>"How? Should I lock it up in a cage?" Hina says, half tauntingly, half with some sort of... understanding. It'd almost be tender if Lisa wasn't so mad. "That's what you do with the things you love, right, Lisachi?"</p><p> </p><p>Lisa lunges forward, slashing with both swords at once, and Hina dives out of their path. She can see an opening if she throws the smaller one, but decides against it. Her only advantage right now is the fact that she has more blades than her opponent.</p><p> </p><p>Hina sees her choice, and tuts. "Still clinging onto stuff! You gotta stop that, Lisachi!"</p><p> </p><p>"Shut up!" Lisa defends against a quick swipe, and cries out furiously, "You don't know anything about me! Don't you dare judge me!"</p><p> </p><p>"I saw you in class the other day, you know. When you pricked your finger..." Hina cocks her head to the side as she dodges. "Why not just tell her? She's your friend."</p><p> </p><p>"She doesn't need to bother with my problems!"</p><p> </p><p>"You're so scared to see her get hurt, Lisachi. So much so that you're pushing her away and letting yourself get hurt over and over!" Hina whirls her chain for a flurry of attacks that Lisa barely manages to deflect. Clang, clang, clang! "I used to be that way, and lemme tell you--" she waves her finger back and forth dismissively. "That's no good! It's not boppin' at all!"</p><p> </p><p>"So what the fuck else am I meant to do!?" Lisa cries out with a pain she hasn't allowed herself to feel in lifetimes. She blinks away the moisture welling up in her eyes, and wills her mental image of Yukina's dismayed face out of her mind.</p><p> </p><p>Hina moves forward in the blink of an eye, grabbing the neck of her shirt and pulling Lisa in. Her breath catches in her throat as Hina's eyes blaze, and a carefree smile crosses her face. "You just gotta let yourself out of that cage, Lisachi. And if you can't do it, let me do it for you."</p><p> </p><p>A swift motion, the music cuts away to silence, and Lisa... her swords are too heavy in her hands. She can't bring herself to stop it.</p><p> </p><p>Her cape billows and floats to the stage floor.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>The wild is calm today, fluttering her bangs gently as it flows through the garden, rocking a wind chime somewhere off in the distance. The sun is hanging close to its end, ready to give way for the moon's rise. Thanks to that there's a beautiful red in the sky above.</p><p> </p><p>The bouquet is in Lisa's hands, and she can feel its small weight as she sits patiently, waiting for her friend to arrive.</p><p> </p><p>It's almost funny. So much hardship, so many times she's fought tooth and nail to avoid this exact day, and now that it's here Lisa feels only a dull, warm sense of calm. She can do this. She has to do this, or nothing will change...</p><p> </p><p>She checks her watch. 6:59, and right on schedule, there are the sounds of Yukina's practical shoes tapping rhythmically against the pavement. It's like music.</p><p> </p><p>Lisa looks up, and this time when she sees the pained, saddened expression on Yukina's face, she doesn't shy away. She doesn't run. She greets her best friend in the world with a smile, even as both their hearts are breaking.</p><p> </p><p>"Lisa, I--"</p><p> </p><p>"It's all right, Yukina." Her voice is calm, soothing. "I know. I just... I want you to take these, okay?"</p><p> </p><p>Yukina doesn't move from her place, and her next words stumble out bluntly. "I don't love you, Lisa, not like that... I just... I don't. I'm sorry."</p><p> </p><p>Lisa extends her hands, and the bouquet hangs between them. "Then take this as a promise, then. We can still love each other the way we always have, as best friends. No matter how I feel, that'll never change, Yukina."</p><p> </p><p>A wavering smile. "Lisa... all right, then." She takes the flowers so carefully, tucking them into her bag. "I... to be honest, I noticed the way you were acting, and I... I was concerned... scared that things would change between us. I hope that's not the case."</p><p> </p><p>"Never!" Lisa says immediately, shaking her head to punctuate her words, "I won't let something as silly as that push us apart. Not anymore."</p><p> </p><p>"Anymore?"</p><p> </p><p>Lisa coughs loudly. "Er, I mean, you know, how I was acting weird! That stops now, I promise."</p><p> </p><p>"I'm glad." Yukina looks away, to the horizon past the garden. "You are an indispensable presence in my life, Lisa, and I do love you as a friend with all my heart. Please never forget that."</p><p> </p><p>She lets a weak smile show, and nods slowly. "I'll do my best."</p><p> </p><p>The sun is barely showing its last, fading light, now. Lisa leans back and lets out a deep breath, stretching her arms up to the sky, and grins widely. "Ahh, it feels good to get all that off my chest!" She turns to Yukina as the thick, tense atmosphere around them finally begins to fade away. "Hey, how'd your fight against Sayo go?"</p><p> </p><p>Yukina smiles. "She fought quite respectably, but I did win in the end."</p><p> </p><p>"You beat her up, didn't you?" Lisa giggles. "Haha, why's everyone dunking on Sayo lately? I feel bad for the poor girl!"</p><p> </p><p>A stern huff comes in response. "What am I meant to do, go easy on her just because we're... classmates? That'd be insulting. Sayo can hold her own well enough." A smile plays at the edges of Yukina's lips. "Ah, except when she's low on arrows..."</p><p> </p><p>Lisa lets out another giggle, then turns her gaze away from Yukina.</p><p> </p><p>The sunset is so beautiful...</p><p> </p><p>They stay to watch it for several long minutes, letting the weight of their conversation sink in with the understanding that there's nothing more left unsaid, before Yukina silently moves to leave. Lisa follows suit, walking in the opposite direction out of the garden.</p><p> </p><p>Lisa keeps walking, then, as soon as Yukina is far enough away, her walk becomes a run.</p><p> </p><p>Her eyes start to blur as her pace speeds up, and she reaches up to roughly wipe away the tears that won't stop coming. She kept it together through all that, after all... She deserves some kind of award. Hey, maybe she is cut out to be a stage girl after all.</p><p> </p><p>A soft impact, and Lisa feels strong, slender arms pull her over into a secluded area. She knows who it is without looking at them, and doesn't resist when they hug her.</p><p> </p><p>There's a hand gently rubbing circles in her back, and the other continues to hold her tight. Lisa buries her face in the other girl's shoulder, under her short braids, and finally lets herself feel everything. She sobs, and wraps herself around her savior tightly. She grieves for her love, her lost lifetimes, for the eternal stage she's given up.</p><p> </p><p>And when her tears are finally done, Hina is still there.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>oh hey it's a series now! how about that. we'll see if i continue further but i do have outlines for more parts, so stay tuned on that front? anyway i hope you all enjoyed this! title is from the song badger by ttng. i'd love to read your comments, and you can also hit me up on twitter @tractioncities!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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